A great teacher of mine is famous for saying, 'When you see an obstacle, get excited.' What is exciting about obstacles, you may ask? Aren't they just barriers in our way? Don't they just stop us from getting what we need and what we want?
Sure. That is one way to consider an obstacle. If we want to travel further down this track, then why not make it someone's fault as well? Let's really go for it. Who can we blame? How can we justify the fact that we're blocked from going forward; that our best intentions and efforts have been thwarted... again.
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Most of us know the result of this type of response and reaction. Nothing. Perhaps frustration, or resignation. Disappointment? Resentment? Maybe even anger. Or depression. Yes, that is certainly one way to meet an obstacle.
But what if we actually saw an obstacle and got excited? Could you imagine it? How do you think you would respond and act if you felt this way?
Before we jump rapidly to excitement, let's take a step back and look at the meaning of an obstacle. Perhaps, in the past, you may have thought an obstacle meant a red light. Another attempt to sabotage our happiness and our success. Another block preventing us from getting what we want and what we need.
Just for a minute, consider this... when we are stationary, nothing is in our way. The surrounding furniture and people nearby are just that. But the moment that we choose to go somewhere, the people nearby, standing by the door, for example, become obstacles. You see... as soon as we are on a path somewhere, as soon as we stop standing still (physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually) the things around us may become obstacles I(or resources- more on that in the next obstacle). Having obstacles actually means that we are going somewhere. It means that we have the desire, the vision, the movement leading us somewhere that we want to go.
It is virtually impossible to be on a path somewhere and NOt meet obstacles. The more successful we become the more obstacles we encounter. It's not the obstacle that prevents our success, it's how we meet it. And in any moment, we can change how we meet and relate to the obstacles in our lives.
Think of the person you admire most. Think of the person you know who has achieved a great deal. Have they really never met an obstacle? Of course not. They have just related to and responded to them in productive ways. And you can too. Easily.
The following is a little story that highlights the possibilities and the potential when we push ourselves to think outside the box.
There was a woman who recently signed up for a goals setting workshop. She was in a bad way, stuck in a negative cycle, feeling pessimistic, unhappy and craving change. About a week before the workshop her ex-partner announced that he couldn't have the children, as arranged. Boom. Another blow. Another obstacle for this woman. More frustration. And more resignation. She gave up. Can you relate? It all just seemed too hard. Thwarted again. Why even bother? This lovely, talented, creative woman had gotten into a habit of playing the martyr - giving up on her dreams and her needs. And here was more proof that life was hard and that she could not get what she wanted or needed.
But did that need to be the end? Were there really no other possibilities? What can you see? If we break it down, and move out of 'shaming, blaming and justifying,' what is a t the crux? What was her main need? To have her children looked after so she could attend the workshop and begin to set some positive goals and plan for the future in an optimistic way.
So, one choice is to get angry at the children's father. Another choice is to fall into victim-hood. And another is to get creative.
A babysitter (a potential solution too having the children looked after)does cost money, extra money this woman didn't have to spend. But by asking the workshop leader if she could go on a payment plan for the workshop, she could re-direct of the workshop fee to pay for the babysitter to enable her to come. It turned out that moving past her obstacle in a fresh way and attending this workshop became the catalyst for a massive change in this woman's life.
Tapping into our creativity is an incredible tool for overcoming our obstacles.
This little story demonstrates that the moment we reframe ourselves and our thinking, the moment we expect to get what we want and to prevail in the face of our obstacles, we start to look for and see new ways forward.
A challenge to you now is, the next time that you encounter an obstacle, sit down with a friend, a neighbor, a relative, a colleague (and make sure it is someone who won't let you buy into your 'story' of defeat and resignation) to brainstorm at least 3 possible ways forward. And if you come up with 3, or even 5 or 10, know that your old pattern of being held back by obstacles is shifting and changing, and that you are on a path to better and bigger things.
To your success.